I'm hiding on the floor next to the couch by the door with a pile of poopy diapers in the corner.
I can't do this in another room because the kids will know I'm up to something and come find me.
I can't do it on the couch because it's too obvious.
So they are watching Frozen while I chug hot chocolate and try not to smell the diapers that I still need to take out (but haven't yet because when I open the door the kids will want to play outside but it's raining so then they'll be mad when I shut it without letting them go) and take a moment to complain about my day.
I try to have a good attitude - I think we all should and do, most of the time - but today, if I'm being honest and truthful, is LAME.
The kids slept terribly last night. Austin and I didn't get much sleep. Jack wanted to eat so often that I felt like I didn't have any more milk but he won't take a bottle. He refused to take his morning nap. All three children pooped within ten minutes, in different rooms, so my whole house smells.
I feel impatient and lackluster. I have to catch myself before I snap at Natalie for some insignificant little thing. I had to force myself to get up and find breakfast for Stockton.
I had a dissatisfying call with our trash company. I tried to have some play time with the kids but Jack was being wriggly and then the ensuing mess made me feel more frustrated. Then I felt frustrated that I was frustrated and it continued in a vicious cycle.
So, I finally got Jack to sleep, put a movie on, dumped the kids on the couch with fruit snacks, and found this little corner of sanity for myself for a few minutes.
I made hot chocolate and had a bowl of cereal because I didn't have the energy to find a healthy breakfast.
I ended up pouring cereal into my hot chocolate powder and having to start all over.
My family is busy and the kids have little coughs so I don't want to infect my friends so here I am, "alone" and feeling rather piteous and doomed and pathetic.
BUT. It's 10:38 and now that my feelings are written down and out of my emotional file folder I feel better. My hot chocolate is gone, along with most of my frustration.
|Natalie asked if my whipped cream|
was a wet wipe....
So even though Austin can't come home for lunch today and I don't have a break in sight and Stockton just pooped again and Jack is stirring after just a weenie little nap, I feel better. My children are darling and I love them very much. My house is in relatively good condition, I read scriptures this morning, and we are watched over and blessed. I got a shower and I'm wearing jeans, so today can't be too bad : )