Thursday, March 17, 2016

"What a Cool Guy"

We say that almost daily about Stockty: "What a cool guy."

Austin let him wear this to church...
He is! He just does what he wants with no fear or shame and owns his own world. He is saying a few more words (bubbles, pop, PopPop, Mimi, Mommy, chips, snacks, megamind, letters, alasdflasjdvoaiwjefMILK - which means chocolate milk haha, just a bunch of jumbled syllables with a prominent MILK at the end) which is so encouraging and wonderful, but we still struggle to communicate with him in clear, back-and-forth ways. I am grateful for every understandable communication that he engages in - I hope I never take that for granted. He loves to laugh, he loves to lay down on the floor and be eye-to-eye with whatever toy is interesting to him that day, he loves vacuums, he loves cheetos. He loves playing peekaboo with Grandpa at dinner as they sit at either end of the table on Sunday nights. He loves sharing PopPop's food while sitting on his lap when he visits us for lunch. He loves running back and forth on the driveway, sometimes stepping one toe (imagine Mrs. Weasley saying that) into the street and then gingerly setting it back haha. He's silly and loud, but also sometimes quiet, and excitable and takes good naps and sleeps 12 hours at night and loves his blankie.

repeatedly spraying himself hahaha, this was so funny to watch, he was giggling so hard

He will be evaluated for developmental disorders in the coming months, in addition to ongoing speech therapy, and we are hopeful that we will continue to find more ways to foster his development and help him communicate. I don't think about it too much, but when I do take a step back and monitor my emotions I find that I am sad that I do not yet have abilities to fully communicate with my beautiful little boy. He has seemed a little more frustrated lately and I am starting to feel more anxiety about how I can help him and what the future looks like. It is hard to know what expectations I should have for him when things are unpredictable and unclear.

Ultimately though, I pray in gratitude every night thanking Heavenly Father that Stockton is in our family. I love the moments when he comes over to find me, seeking out my physical presence, and just wants to be with me. Earlier this week he brought me a book and sat in my lap and let me read to him, which is rare. He loves to sing and it is so sweet to hear his little voice mumbling through the words of "I Am a Child of God" and the ABCs and so many other songs. He gets a certain look in his eyes sometimes when he is especially in earnest about something, and I love watching him and trying to imagine what he is trying to tell me. I love our little buddy so very much and am grateful for his impact on our family.

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